From math.fu-berlin.de!xlink.net!sol.ctr.columbia.edu!usc!wupost!uunet!vtserf.cc.vt.edu!polaris.async.vt.edu!jfurr Tue Aug 10 00:07:31 1993 Newsgroups: alt.humor.best-of-usenet Path: math.fu-berlin.de!xlink.net!sol.ctr.columbia.edu!usc!wupost!uunet!vtserf.cc.vt.edu!polaris.async.vt.edu!jfurr From: tor@netcom.com (Tor Slettnes) Subject: [comp.os.ms*] Re: comp.os.msdos.wizards FAQ Message-ID: Followup-To: alt.humor.best-of-usenet.d Sender: jfurr@polaris.async.vt.edu (Joel Furr) Organization: Netcom, Sacramento Date: Mon, 2 Aug 1993 04:12:53 GMT Approved: best@polaris.async.vt.edu Lines: 73 Newsgroups: comp.os.ms-windows.misc,comp.os.ms-windows.programmer,comp.os.msdos Subject: Re: comp.os.msdos.wizards FAQ From: cemeier@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu (Charles E Meier) What the comp.os.ms-dos.wizards FAQ might look like if there were a comp.os.ms-dos.wizards. Please do not post to this group unless you can write a badly designed operating system from scratch :-). Q1) What is the difference between an Operating System (OS) and an Operating Environment (OE)? A1) OSs do useful work for programmers. OEs require programmers to do useful work for themselves. Q2) Is DOS/Windows an OS or an OE? A2) DOS is neither, it is an ON (Operating Nightmare). Q3) What does the NT stand for in Windows-NT? A4) Nightmare Two. Q5) How rich is Bill Gates? A5) Questions about Bill Gates should be directed to alt.tv.barney.die.die. Q6) Are there any original ideas in DOS or are the concepts entirely borrowed? A6) Only DOS requires a console device driver to perform media checks. Q7) What are undocumented DOS functions? A7) Reserved. May not be supported in a future version of this FAQ. Q8) What is VCPI? A8) The Very Confusing Programmer's Interface is a specification designed to ensure that 32-bit protected mode programs could interfere with each other just as easily as ordinary real mode DOS programs. Superceeded by DPMI. Q9) What is DPMI? A9) Dumb Programmers at Microsoft, Inc. is a law passed by the U.S. Congress to ensure a uniform standard for protected mode programs. The U.S. Supreme Court has, however, declared Microsoft to be PC (Programming Challenged) and given them the right to ignore their own standard. Q10) What is the Treaty of Tordesillas? A10) Secret contract between Microsoft and IBM to split the operating system world in two. Possibly sanctioned by the Pope. Further inquiries should be directed to alt.conspiracies. Another day of programming frustration. Charles Meier cemeier@magnus.acs.ohio-state.edu -- -- alt.humor.best-of-usenet -- -- Funniest postings from USENET, altnet, and the worlds beyond -- -- Moderator's address: best@polaris.async.vt.edu --